Friday, February 24, 2012

I just felt like writing this all down

Recently I have been so upset by a person I knew for a short time. I had been a wreck with all of her drama for months before I stepped aside and decided I wasn't going to deal with it anymore. That was just after Thanksgiving and it keeps rolling in. I am doing so poorly at this point that I am losing sleep over it and feel sick and stressed all the time. I have deleted people off my Facebook that may have associations with people who may have associations with her. I have had to block my Facebook page so that anyone not on my list can not see or message me at all. And anytime I try to defend myself, everything I say gets twisted and skewed. I haven't the energy to deal with this anymore and my most recent responses in this matter have been posted publicly on Facebook. To look at her page, you would think I was out to get her. You would think I intended to torment her and ruin her. All because I met the guy she was having an affair with that she had me believing was her boyfriend. When I found out the truth, I tried to reason with her and discovered that she was completely disillusioned about the whole thing. She has even gone as far as to tell me that things I was witness to happened in a different way. All making her out to be the victim of some malicious plot. She's claiming I hacked her accounts/emails and shared her private information with people. She claims that I am obsessed with the guy that she was having the affair with. I worry each night when I go to bed about the fact that this person knows where I live and where my children go to school. But I have no concrete evidence that it is her writings that are the delusion and not mine. So legally, there doesn't seem to be anything I can do about it. In an effort to protect myself, online at least, I changed all of my e-mails and passwords for everything I do. Tacked on extra security measures in places where that is possible. I have changed my network configurations at home to only allow hardware that I own to connect. I feel like I sound paranoid. But if it's true, is it paranoia? I do not know how far this will go. There has been no personal contact other than online since November 2011. I have had people, one was a mutual friend and one a person I had never met, send me messages on her behalf in an "attempt to help." I have archived all of that for my own protection, but I don't know that anything in these messages would hold up as proof because without the context and history, they would not read as threatening. I have tried to screenshot as much actual page data as I can from her Facebook wall, but she will frequently delete the posts shortly after someone will comment on them. I have since blocked her Facebook and any of her friends who had met me and/or contacted me. I don't even know if this makes sense and I am sure it's not in chronological order in any way. I just needed a place to vent. If you read this, thanks for making it this far. I feel better just getting it typed out.

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